5 Ways to Lose Connection and 1 Way to Find It

5 Ways to Lose Connection

#5 – Momentary Distractions

It’s hard to go anywhere today and not see people absorbed with electronic devices. We work on our computers during meals, we browse our phones during commutes, and we watch TV on treadmills at the gym. All of these distract us from what we are doing or where we are in that moment. We don’t fully taste what we are eating or notice the world around us or feel our bodies move.

#4 – Electronic Communication

Words are only one form of human communication. Written words are even more limited. Without context, tone of voice and body language, we often misinterpret what we read in texts and emails. Yet most of our daily communication now comes via these two sources. It’s not even necessary to leave the house to communicate with friends, family and coworkers – but how much connection does this type of communication provide?

#3 – Past/Future Worries

How often have you found yourself zoning out mid-conversation? Where did your focus go? Our brains are immense information processors that often get caught up in thoughts about past events or future concerns. We worry about everything. We feel the need to constantly remind ourselves of our “to do” lists. All of our brainpower is rarely focused on what is happening in the moment.

#2 – Self Focus

We worry about what people think of us. Do we appear confident? Are we hip and cool? Our conversations are infiltrated by these thoughts, turning our focus inward instead of on the other person. We spend a lot of time trying to improve our attractiveness. It’s good to be self-aware and notice what we are feeling. But are we so self-focused that we aren't connecting with the person we are talking to?

#1 – Fears

Fear of rejection. Fear we won’t be good at it. Fear we don’t deserve it. There are a lot of reasons we hold back from making connections. It’s easier to stay home and browse our friends’ walls on Facebook. But the loneliness remains. Socialization is a biological need. How can we overcome our fears and seek connection out in the world?

1 Way to Find Connection

#1 – Be Present

Connection improves when we are completely present in the moment. This is true for connecting to self, others, and our environments. Turn off the electronics. Have in-person conversations. Let go of the future and the past. Focus on the person across from you. Don’t let your fears hold you back.

Yes, this is all easier said than done. Yes, it can be uncomfortable and hard at first. Just like everything, it gets better with practice. How can you be present today? What new things do you notice? How do you feel more connected?

Are you struggling to create connections in your life? We want to help by starting where you are and developing a personalized approach to health and connection. Contact us today to set up a free 30-minute consultation.  

Moms, Make the Most of Your Day (and More)

This Sunday is Mothers’ Day, and Moms everywhere will be enjoying gifts of flowers and cards, breakfasts in bed, and general well-deserved appreciation.

And then Monday comes. All of us Moms go back to work – making sure the kids and spouse leave for school and work on time, running errands and buying groceries, cooking and cleaning… It’s another 364 days until our next holiday.

Fellow Moms, I’m going to propose something radical. After our kids pamper us on Sunday, let’s take over and keep it going. How can we pamper and take care of ourselves for the next 364 days?

Make Time for Activities that Make You Happy

What are ten things you love to do? How often do you get a chance to do them? Most likely not as often as you would like. Pull out your calendar and schedule time for you to do the things that you love. You deserve to enjoy all of life as much as everyone else.

Manage Your Energy

Over-functioning and over-commitment are the biggest drainers of our energy. Learning to say “no” is one of the most important self-care skills. Write down your priorities and values. Ask yourself if your daily life reflects these or if you are spending time and energy on unimportant things.

Rebuild Your Reserves

For all the energy we use, we need time to rebuild it. Rest your mind and body with meditative activities such as yoga. Treat food as fuel by eating regular, healthy meals. Keep your body in shape with a balance of strength, cardio and flexibility exercises. Remember, you can’t take care of anyone else if you haven’t taken care of yourself first.

Create Healthy Connections

Relationships are an important part of a fulfilling life. Support your relationships by being present in the moment. Turn off distractions (phone, computer, TV), focus your attention to what’s going on around you, and be 100% here. Let go of worrying about the past. Stop mentally reviewing your “to do” list over and over. Be here, and see how it changes your relationships.

Change the Negatives to Positives

We tend to be harder on ourselves than anyone else. Are your expectations realistic? We all want to be “Super Mom,” but what is that expectation doing to our happiness and enjoyment of life? It’s not about being perfect – it’s about doing your best in the moment with the given circumstances and what you know. Take this as an opportunity to role model a healthy mindset for your kids.

This is a good start, but now it’s time for you to take control. What can you do to make the most of your day, every day? We would love to hear from you! Share your thoughts on our Facebook page and let’s keep Moms’ Day going all year long!