5 Ways to Lose Connection and 1 Way to Find It

5 Ways to Lose Connection

#5 – Momentary Distractions

It’s hard to go anywhere today and not see people absorbed with electronic devices. We work on our computers during meals, we browse our phones during commutes, and we watch TV on treadmills at the gym. All of these distract us from what we are doing or where we are in that moment. We don’t fully taste what we are eating or notice the world around us or feel our bodies move.

#4 – Electronic Communication

Words are only one form of human communication. Written words are even more limited. Without context, tone of voice and body language, we often misinterpret what we read in texts and emails. Yet most of our daily communication now comes via these two sources. It’s not even necessary to leave the house to communicate with friends, family and coworkers – but how much connection does this type of communication provide?

#3 – Past/Future Worries

How often have you found yourself zoning out mid-conversation? Where did your focus go? Our brains are immense information processors that often get caught up in thoughts about past events or future concerns. We worry about everything. We feel the need to constantly remind ourselves of our “to do” lists. All of our brainpower is rarely focused on what is happening in the moment.

#2 – Self Focus

We worry about what people think of us. Do we appear confident? Are we hip and cool? Our conversations are infiltrated by these thoughts, turning our focus inward instead of on the other person. We spend a lot of time trying to improve our attractiveness. It’s good to be self-aware and notice what we are feeling. But are we so self-focused that we aren't connecting with the person we are talking to?

#1 – Fears

Fear of rejection. Fear we won’t be good at it. Fear we don’t deserve it. There are a lot of reasons we hold back from making connections. It’s easier to stay home and browse our friends’ walls on Facebook. But the loneliness remains. Socialization is a biological need. How can we overcome our fears and seek connection out in the world?

1 Way to Find Connection

#1 – Be Present

Connection improves when we are completely present in the moment. This is true for connecting to self, others, and our environments. Turn off the electronics. Have in-person conversations. Let go of the future and the past. Focus on the person across from you. Don’t let your fears hold you back.

Yes, this is all easier said than done. Yes, it can be uncomfortable and hard at first. Just like everything, it gets better with practice. How can you be present today? What new things do you notice? How do you feel more connected?

Are you struggling to create connections in your life? We want to help by starting where you are and developing a personalized approach to health and connection. Contact us today to set up a free 30-minute consultation.